Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Epilogue
Part 5
NOT AFRAID
Derek-M peeps at Sky-M through the window of their home, his first time back in nearly eight months now, since that fated day when he reluctantly said his goodbye. But it’s not quite ready yet, so here he remains, passer-by, sullen, lonely, hidden.
Suddenly, Rain appears behind him. “What are you doing, Derek?… You were our only hope…”
Derek-M looks at her disdainfully. “I told all of you to stay away.”
“What are you playing at, Derek?… Don’t you know none of this matters? It’s already gone! It’s too late!”
“Too late?! I’m so sick of that shit!”
*Tcht* “He’s using profanity.” *Tcht* Rain radios in.
“Profanity?… Maaannnn….. FUCK PROFANITY!”
“Anyway, please, go on. It’s too late; it’s true and you know it!”
“I don’t know shit! All I know is what you see up here are just POINTS OF DATA, nothing more!… Disconnected, discontinuous, points of data… But what connects that data? What makes the path from your point A to point B? Can you tell me that?”
“… You guys do, I guess, down there…”
“Exactly… down here… and time itself being a variable in that equation, that path from point A to point B. Down here, we’re on the side of time, and time is on our side.”
“But what’s the point if it’s all going to end anyway? All this is dead, actually it’s already gone!”
“You guys just don’t get it do you?! This is the point! … See this home? This is our home! See this flag? It’s our flag! These things mean something! All those left here in the world, they mean something! Yeah we’re all going to die one day, but hell, while we’re here, while we’re alive, we’ll celebrate life! You don’t worry about tomorrow today; you worry about today today! … If we were to follow your train of thought, we’d have to deny our own existence since everything born in time dies in time, even this entire solar system, this entire galaxy… and yet… here we are! And surely something from eternity came with us, else why would we have come into existence in the first place?”
“Very convincing… No wonder Marion had to find out for himself after talking with you… No wonder he was so quick to snatch up that old man’s body… But I won’t be led astray so easily…”
“I’m not here to convince anyone. I told you to stay away.”
“As you wish… You’re grasping at straws and you know it. I’ll be with Razor if you change your mind. It’s time to start over.” Rain turns around and walks off.
“Razor?… when’d you join him?”
Rain turns back from a distance, “Time’s up, Derek… goodbye.” She disappears into the night as Derek-M begins to sing1:
PlayI’m not afraid (I’m not afraid)
(Yeah)
To take a stand (to take a stand)
(It’s been a ride)
Everybody (everybody)
(I guess I had to go to that place)
Come take my hand (come take my hand)
(To get to this one)
We’ll walk this road together, through the storm
(Now some o’ you)
Whatever weather, cold or warm
(Might still be in that place)
Just lettin’ you know that you’re not alone
(If you tryin’ ta get out)
Holla if you feel like you’ve been down the same road
(Just follow me, I’ll get ya there)You can try and read my lyrics off o’ this paper before I lay ‘em
But you won’t take the sting out these words before I say ‘em
‘Cause ain’t no way I’ma let you stop me from causin’ mayhem
When I say I’ma do somethin’ I do it
I don’t give a damn what you think
I’m doin’ this for me, so fuck the world, feed it beans
It’s gassed up, if it thinks o’ stopping me
I’ma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly
And all those who look down on me I’m tearin’ down your balcony
No if ands or buts, don’t try to ask him why or how can he
From Infinite down to the last Relapse album he’s still shittin’
Whether he’s on salary, paid hourly
Until he bows out or he shits his bowels out of him
Whichever comes first, for better or worse
He’s married to the game
Like a fuck you for Christmas, his gift is a curse
Forget the earth he’s got the urge to pull his dick from the dirt
And fuck the whole universeI’m not afraid (I’m not afraid)
To take a stand (to take a stand)
Everybody (everybody)
Come take my hand (come take my hand)
We’ll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just lettin’ you know that you’re not alone
Holla if you feel like you’ve been down the same roadOkay quit playin’ with the scissors and shit, and cut the crap
I shouldn’t have to rhyme these words in a rhythm for you to know it’s a rap
You said you was king, you lied through your teeth
For that fuck your feelings, instead of getting crowned you’re gettin’ capped
And to the fans, I’ll never let you down again, I’m back
I promise to never go back on that promise, in fact
Let’s be honest, that last Relapse CD was ehh
Perhaps I ran them accents into the ground
Relax, I ain’t going back to that now
All I’m tryna say is get back, click-clack BLAOW
Cause I ain’t playin’ around
It’s a game called circle and I don’t know how
I’m way too up to back down
But I think I’m still tryna figure this crap out
Thought I had it mapped out but I guess I didn’t
This fuckin’ black cloud still follows me around
But it’s time to exercise these demons
These muhfuckers are doin’ jumping jacks now!I’m not afraid (I’m not afraid)
To take a stand (to take a stand)
Everybody (everybody)
Come take my hand (come take my hand)
We’ll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just lettin’ you know that you’re not alone
Holla if you feel like you’ve been down the same roadAnd I just can’t keep living this way
So starting today, I’m breaking out of this cage
I’m standin’ up, I’ma face my demons
I’m mannin’ up, I’ma hold my ground
I’ve had enough, now I’m so fed up
Time to put my life back together right nowIt was my decision to get clean, I did it for me
Admittedly I probably did it subliminally for you
So I could come back a brand new me, you helped see me through
And don’t even realize what you did, believe me you
I been through the ringer, but they can do little to the middle finger
I think I got a tear in my eye, I feel like the king of
My world, haters can make like bees with no stingers, and drop dead
No more beef flingers
No more drama from now on, I promise to focus solely on
Handling my responsibilities as a father
So I solemnly swear to always treat this roof like my daughters and raise it
You couldn’t lift a single shingle on it
‘Cause the way I feel, I’m strong enough to go to the club
Or the corner pub and lift the whole liquor counter up
‘Cause I’m raisin’ the bar, I shoot for the moon
But I’m too busy gazing at stars, I feel amazing andI’m not afraid (I’m not afraid)
To take a stand (to take a stand)
Everybody (everybody)
Come take my hand (come take my hand)
We’ll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just lettin’ you know that you’re not alone
Holla if you feel like you’ve been down the same road
1. Eminem – Not Afraid
